Praising God and Insurance

I am SO amazed at the power of prayer sometimes. I JUST sent my insurance card to the clinic yesterday afternoon and today I get a call from their insurance coordinator and she says that I will only need to pay $520 for my transfer!!!! Insurance is covering the rest!!!!! Praise God!!!

So with our tax refund and the money I've saved will be able to go any time we get ready!!!! I would LOVE to go in February, but my son will be out of school on spring break mid March so I think we'll go then. That way he's not in school and can spend the time having fun with my parents. :~)

I am just SO thrilled to not have to stress over the money and not have to worry if we'll have enough by the time we want to go. This past week has been a very stressful and upsetting week because of some family and work issues, but this is such a GREAT way to end the week!

Thanks for all the prayers from my blog friends.

Back to zero and ready to go!!!

I finally went and had that last HCG level check and found out last week it was a 4. That's considered negative. So I emailed my clinic tonight and the coordinator said we are good to go!!! She said as soon as I have AF we can start again so for me to call or email when we are ready!!!! I had this flood of emotions reading those words. Until now I've been quite reserved about it all. After the email it's like reality hit. I am anxious, scared, and excited all at the same time.

Right before the email I had prayed that God would give me peace and help me not fear for another miscarriage, but to enjoy every second of this NEW journey like it is my very first. I have faith that God will help me do that. :~)

Researching Travel Plans

This weekend I spent some time looking up places to say in CA (the clinic is in Thousand Oaks). We are hoping to do a transfer either end of March or first of April so I've got about 2 months to figure out where to stay before I need to make travel plans.

Last time Mom and I stayed in Thousand Oaks and took a taxi every where we needed to go. We had a town car pick us up at the airport and drop us back off there which was pretty nice. This time Greg is going with me. Dr. K would prefer me not to drive the day of transfer and I personally would prefer not to drive at all to keep my stress level as low as possible. (I've driven in several large cities, but nothing like LA) Greg is a nervous driver and so it's best he not drive either.

So the dilema is that I am planning that this will be our last trip to CA for a long while and I'd like us to see some of the sights in the area while we are there the first day. I've got to figure out what the most cost effective way to do some sightseeing without renting a car. HA! Yes, I know cost effective and flying half way across the country don't really go together, but I'm trying. :~)

I also need to go have one more HCG test to make sure my numbers are back down to zero. They should be by now. I think they were 100 something over a month ago. I'm hoping that I won't have to have another saline ultrasound done. Can't remember the official name of that thing. Funny how much you forget when you're not in the thick of things. Anyway, I'll get my memory back and remember what all this process entails very soon I'm sure. ;~)

Happy New Year!!!

It's hard to believe 2011 is here. I am thrilled to have so many plans for this new year. I'm not a fan of resolutions, but I do like to plan a few things to finish each year and this year it will be to pay off several bills and most importantly to go back to CA for another transfer.

Greg and I had a long talk about where we are now and where we are going in terms of our family. We have been praying for answers and feel we've gotten a few signs as to God's will.

I always like to record the signs so I can some day tell my children. I did that with my first child and will do that with this child as well.

So first off we went to the store to look for a couple of ornaments for the tree. They were half price so I wanted to get a few to add to the tree for next year. My tree is decorated in green and red so that's all I was looking at. Greg pointed out this cute ornament (not in the red and free section) that was 3 snow people. (a Dad, Mom, and child) We were laughing about how that was our ornament. I picked up another one just below that one and it had a banner that said "Parents To Be". I couldn't even tell you what else was on it because I was so shocked that I put it back down and had to leave that isle.

I've had several signs through the years for different things when I've prayed for guidance. However, the sign I got a couple days ago has to be the most direct I have EVER had.

Greg and I were tiling our dining area. I had a bunch of spacers that I took out of the bag and threw on top of one of the tiles. I kept on tiling and then when I went to pick up one of the spacers I noticed the ones I'd thrown down formed a shape. I called Greg over to look and we laughed about it and he asked me to take a picture so we could figure out what it was. Just as I went to take a picture it dawned on me what it was....from where Greg stood it was a "C" and from where I was standing it looked like an "A". (I swear I didn't line these up and no one else was around who could have lined them up.) So I guess back to CA it is. :)

~edited to add picture of the CA~

Been a while & Merry Christmas

I haven't blogged in about a month now. We've been very busy on the house and on just living life as a family of 3. We took some family pictures in front of the Christmas tree this year.  Our first family picture in several years.

On the embryo adoption front, we are 90% sure we will be going back for one more transfer either the end of March or first part of April. It's taken me this last month to finally decide that I want to try again. My husband is just sort of leaving it up to me. He wants another child, but doesn't want to push me since it's my body that will go through all of this.

Our house in coming along nicely. It's really been a good stress reliever actually. Painting has really helped me relax and process everything that's happened over the last months.

I'm finally excited about trying again. :~)

Latest happenings in our world

I went last week for my weekly beta test. I will be SO glad when these are over. My number was down to 315 which is good. Hopefully just one more time and my numbers will be back to zero. (Whew!) I've heard women take months to get back to zero so I'm very pleased that it will have taken me just a little more than a month.

AF showed up just like clock work. Exactly 30 days from the date I miscarried I got AF. Glad my body isn't all jacked up and is still working right. Hopefully that cyst went right along with AF.

On the weight side I'm still losing. I'm down a total of 15lbs so far and I'm feeling SO great. My clothes are getting lose and I LOVE that feeling. Just 25lbs to go until my first goal!!! I was thinking the other day about how I'd treat myself once I got my 40lbs off. I think I'll treat myself to a massage!!! I love getting them and it will also be good to get the blood flowing before transfer. :~)

We have been super busy working on our house lately. We want to get as much done (hopefully everything) as possible before we head back to CA for another FET. Our goal is to finish everything by Jan 1 and then from then until March or April save up enough to do another FET. I'm thrilled with the way the house is looking. We've painted cabinets, put in new flooring in the living room, installed new countertops, and several other smaller projects. We've needed to do these things for a very long time, but kept putting it off thinking we'd adopt again and use the money for that instead. I finally got to a point where I said we should just fix the house and hold off on the adoption (or FET since we are doing that now) until we had the house totally fixed up. Then that would be one less worry for me while going through this next cycle.

I expect I'll be talking to Dr. K in another week or so about what we plan to do next. He told me a while back that we'd talk as soon as my numbers were back to zero. I'm curious to hear his thoughts on our decision to wait and to see what he would suggest doing next time around. I'm also hoping to talk to him about insurance. My insurance will cover up to $14k in fertility treatments, but I'm not sure if we qualify since we used donor embryos. Last time we didn't try to file on insurance because we wanted to hurry up and get the transfer done. We paid out of pocket. This time we are waiting a while so I figure it doesn't hurt to see if insurance will cover at least Dr. K's fee so that all we'll pay for is our travel.

As for emotionally I'm feeling really good. Of course I wish I was still pregnant, but I know now that there was a reason God took my babies home and I can accept that. I'm not 100% ready for another FET, but I'm sure by next year I probably will be. I think for now I'm just so focused on fixing up our house that the FET isn't really on my mind. However, I have been thinking about what we would do if this next transfer doesn't take and I'm 90% sure this transfer will be our last. Yes I know we've only done one so far, but my son will be 9 next year and I just think if this one doesn't work that it's time to stop and accept that he'll be an only child. Not the end of the world by any means, but not something I really wanted either. However, we need to move forward as a family so after this next transfer I think we're done.

All that said, I am SO expecting this time to work!!! :~) I joke with a friend of mine that I'm waiting for her (or she's waiting for me, we're not really sure). She and I met through email when we adopted our boys. We've talked via email almost daily every since (that was 9 years ago) and we've met in person a few times and taken a family vacation together as well. She's hoping to adopt again and I told her a long time ago that we'd have to adopt at the same time again. Well looks like that's God's plan because when one of us gets held up, then the other of us gets held up. So I'm hoping we BOTH get moving really soon and quit holding each other up. LOL

Latest checkup and plans for the future

I had a doctor appointment last Wednesday. My numbers were down to 1112 and I now have a cyst in my uterus. My OB said the cyst should go away on it's own after I have a few periods.

We were talking about going back to CA for another FET in January, but after doing more thinking we think it might be best if we wait until March or April instead.

We have alot of work that needs to be done on our house. We've been doing it a little here and a little there, but we really want to get everything done. So if we wait until spring for the FET, that will give us time to finish off the house.

I have lost about 100 lbs over the course of a couple of years. During the past 8 months of waiting for the FET, hormones and then the miscarriage, I gained about 30 lbs. I want to lose at least 40 lbs before we do another transfer. That will put me 60 lbs from my final goal. So taking a break will give me that time I need to get healthy as well. I started working on losing weight again two weeks ago and so far I've lost 12.8 lbs towards my 40 lb goal!

I can't say right now that I'm looking forward to another FET, but I can say I'm looking forward to getting my house and health back in order. I think THEN I'll be ready to try another FET. :)